Generally, I loathe sentimentality, so I have reservations about doing this... but I feel guilty cuz I participated on a different blog, and have yet to put his on my own... I'll sandwich this between a story, which I'll try to post right away...
01. Reply with your name and I will write something about you.
02. I will then tell what song/movie remind me of you.
03. If I were to apply an o'clock to you, it would be...
04. I will try to name a single word that best describes you.
05. I'll tell you the most memorable moment I've had with you.
06. I will tell you what animal you remind me of.
07. I'll then tell you something that I've always wondered about you.
08. Put this in your journal.
(In case you noticed, these are not necessarily serious questions so I will not necessarily put heartfelt and deep answers)
Thursday, June 09, 2005
Monday, June 06, 2005
Mop
So, as I'm sure you can imagine, I have to mop the the store at some point during my shift...
Its sad but true (I think I've mentioned mopping before, but never as an active complaint)
This weekend, mopping became my least favourite chore...
Imagine this... You arrive to work to find a note in your internal log (I'm sorry but I broke the mop).. followed a few pages later by "I think the replacement mop isn't broken" followed a few pages later still by "the dinkt little mop doesnt work at all"...
Joy!
So, I'm sure your all wondering, how does one mop a store with no mop?
A ha ha ha ha ha
You use a push broom which you have to dip in water every 10 seconds...
And it doesnt really 'mop' per se...
It more or less just pushes muddy water around the store...
but with repeated dipping and pushing, the water gets less and less murky...
Result: after 2 hours of mopping a store that looks like it has brown tiled flooring... and an employee whom looks like he wants to go home...
As a side note... If you are reading this, and your blog is listed on left hand side, and you have not updated your blog recently (I'll let you decide what recent is) I suggest you do so... I need something to read as well...
Its sad but true (I think I've mentioned mopping before, but never as an active complaint)
This weekend, mopping became my least favourite chore...
Imagine this... You arrive to work to find a note in your internal log (I'm sorry but I broke the mop).. followed a few pages later by "I think the replacement mop isn't broken" followed a few pages later still by "the dinkt little mop doesnt work at all"...
Joy!
So, I'm sure your all wondering, how does one mop a store with no mop?
A ha ha ha ha ha
You use a push broom which you have to dip in water every 10 seconds...
And it doesnt really 'mop' per se...
It more or less just pushes muddy water around the store...
but with repeated dipping and pushing, the water gets less and less murky...
Result: after 2 hours of mopping a store that looks like it has brown tiled flooring... and an employee whom looks like he wants to go home...
As a side note... If you are reading this, and your blog is listed on left hand side, and you have not updated your blog recently (I'll let you decide what recent is) I suggest you do so... I need something to read as well...
Friday, June 03, 2005
Multiple Purchases
Today was an alright day -- I was lazy as heck, but thats besides the point ;)
Anyways, an extended Sikh family comes in to the (I say extended because the three women look excpetionally alike and were wearing matching clothing... well their clothing was made of matching fabric... really nice silk...)
They brought with them children, who inevitably ran straight for the slurpee machine... Each person grabed a slurpee cup, filled it up and came back to the till... Otherwise, these would have been perfectly acceptable customers, had what transpired next not occured...
I ring in the slurpees, announce the total, ask for a ptro points card, offer the upsell (doritos for $0.79) and grab the method of payment. A mastercard.
I swipe it through and the computer goes through the verification process... I return the card...
It usually takes about 6 seconds, there is a timer on the computer...
About 4 seconds in to the verification, one of the ladies announces she would like a pack of Peter Jackson light kingsize.
I grab it, and ask for a method of payment, she slides the credit card back across the counter...
O...kay...
I ring it through...
This is where the boyfriend comes from out of nowhere, and puts bottles of pop on the counter, announcing this too (the recipt from the smokes transaction is already printing)...
I ring the bottles of pop in, ask how theyd like to pay for this, the credit card comes sliding back...
This time I check... "Is this everything?" I ask sheepishly...
*nods*
I swipe the card a third time, verification again...
The boyfriend is halfway across the store grabbing bags of chips before the recipt starts printing...
He comes back with two bads of doritos (on special for 2/$5), for the final transaction on the card...
So now I'm standing here waiting for him to sign for all four purchases (each recipt is a must sign) thinking "I hope he gets a paper cut"...
No such luck...
My last hope is that he gets charged an exhorbant amount when he exceeds a certain number of transactions...
Anyways, an extended Sikh family comes in to the (I say extended because the three women look excpetionally alike and were wearing matching clothing... well their clothing was made of matching fabric... really nice silk...)
They brought with them children, who inevitably ran straight for the slurpee machine... Each person grabed a slurpee cup, filled it up and came back to the till... Otherwise, these would have been perfectly acceptable customers, had what transpired next not occured...
I ring in the slurpees, announce the total, ask for a ptro points card, offer the upsell (doritos for $0.79) and grab the method of payment. A mastercard.
I swipe it through and the computer goes through the verification process... I return the card...
It usually takes about 6 seconds, there is a timer on the computer...
About 4 seconds in to the verification, one of the ladies announces she would like a pack of Peter Jackson light kingsize.
I grab it, and ask for a method of payment, she slides the credit card back across the counter...
O...kay...
I ring it through...
This is where the boyfriend comes from out of nowhere, and puts bottles of pop on the counter, announcing this too (the recipt from the smokes transaction is already printing)...
I ring the bottles of pop in, ask how theyd like to pay for this, the credit card comes sliding back...
This time I check... "Is this everything?" I ask sheepishly...
*nods*
I swipe the card a third time, verification again...
The boyfriend is halfway across the store grabbing bags of chips before the recipt starts printing...
He comes back with two bads of doritos (on special for 2/$5), for the final transaction on the card...
So now I'm standing here waiting for him to sign for all four purchases (each recipt is a must sign) thinking "I hope he gets a paper cut"...
No such luck...
My last hope is that he gets charged an exhorbant amount when he exceeds a certain number of transactions...
Wednesday, June 01, 2005
Full Service
I love doing full serve... Nothing makes me happier than charging someone 118.9 cents a litre to put premium gas into a vehicle that would more than likely survive on regular; simply for the fact that 1) the oerson is too dumb to pump the gas themselves and 2) they dont know that high octane fuel is not necessary for the health of most cars...
But thats not my complaint about full serve today...
Oh golly no... You should know my blogs better than that...
I go outside to do a full serve... I wash the windows, check oil, and put on the biggest and brightest Tiny Tim smile at the meager tip I get (as if it's going to make this years Christmas the best Christmas Ever! God Bless Us, Everyone!!!), complete the transaction, etc etc etc...
I stayed behind for a few seconds, because I noticed the full serve garbage can was approaching the overflow capacity... And its really lame trying to get those garbage bags from the waste receptical to the dumpster if they're full...
I then go inside to continue my duties as the best Petro Can GSA in Canada (plaque pending)...
A few seconds after entering through the main door, I am informed that there is another car pulling into full serve...
I say pulling in, because it makes the next part of the story that much more obscene (please note my fellow GSA saw the car pull in, I did not)...
I get outside, the windows down and the automatic gas door is open already... and as no attempt on the part of the occupants to remove their persons from the vehicle, so I assume this is a legitimate full serve... (we get a lot of illigitimate full serves... people that pull up, and are out of their cars as we walk up... I try to stand just slightly off to the side of the giant sign that says "FULL SERVE" in these situations, as it makes them feel that much more stupid for having missed it in the first place... Combined with the fact that it allows them to come to the realization themselves, that they did something stupid, and that way I dont have to discipline them... But i should really get back to my story)
I walk around to the drivers door, trying to be as polite as possible; making eye contact, smiling slightly, standing just away from the vehicle so as not to appear to threatening (as a male with piercings, I find that people geta little scared by me)...
What happens next caught me really off guard...
She starts yelling at me for taking so long and shes been waiting for ten minutes and she has to get home because her baby needs to have his diaper changed and she has to get the roast in the oven because it needs to be cooked for when her husband gets home and she thought she would take full serve because its quicker and more convenient except today because I took my sweet assed time getting outside and now her entire day is ruined and shell call my manager and tell her all of this and Im going ot be so sorry that I took so long because shes going ot make such a big deal out of this and did she mention that shes pregnant again and its really hard for her to stand up and she didnt want to have to pay the extra four cents a litre but she was sure that it would be quick but it wasnt and shell never take full serve at this petro can location again and I should reimburse her for the extra four cents because the amount of time I took was uncalled for and....
I'm sure you get the idea...
Keep in mind that:
1) I was supposed to reimburse her for gasoline I didnt put in her car
2)My co worker saw her pulling in...
3) I could have filled her tank in the time it took her to rant on and on like that...
Fini
But thats not my complaint about full serve today...
Oh golly no... You should know my blogs better than that...
I go outside to do a full serve... I wash the windows, check oil, and put on the biggest and brightest Tiny Tim smile at the meager tip I get (as if it's going to make this years Christmas the best Christmas Ever! God Bless Us, Everyone!!!), complete the transaction, etc etc etc...
I stayed behind for a few seconds, because I noticed the full serve garbage can was approaching the overflow capacity... And its really lame trying to get those garbage bags from the waste receptical to the dumpster if they're full...
I then go inside to continue my duties as the best Petro Can GSA in Canada (plaque pending)...
A few seconds after entering through the main door, I am informed that there is another car pulling into full serve...
I say pulling in, because it makes the next part of the story that much more obscene (please note my fellow GSA saw the car pull in, I did not)...
I get outside, the windows down and the automatic gas door is open already... and as no attempt on the part of the occupants to remove their persons from the vehicle, so I assume this is a legitimate full serve... (we get a lot of illigitimate full serves... people that pull up, and are out of their cars as we walk up... I try to stand just slightly off to the side of the giant sign that says "FULL SERVE" in these situations, as it makes them feel that much more stupid for having missed it in the first place... Combined with the fact that it allows them to come to the realization themselves, that they did something stupid, and that way I dont have to discipline them... But i should really get back to my story)
I walk around to the drivers door, trying to be as polite as possible; making eye contact, smiling slightly, standing just away from the vehicle so as not to appear to threatening (as a male with piercings, I find that people geta little scared by me)...
What happens next caught me really off guard...
She starts yelling at me for taking so long and shes been waiting for ten minutes and she has to get home because her baby needs to have his diaper changed and she has to get the roast in the oven because it needs to be cooked for when her husband gets home and she thought she would take full serve because its quicker and more convenient except today because I took my sweet assed time getting outside and now her entire day is ruined and shell call my manager and tell her all of this and Im going ot be so sorry that I took so long because shes going ot make such a big deal out of this and did she mention that shes pregnant again and its really hard for her to stand up and she didnt want to have to pay the extra four cents a litre but she was sure that it would be quick but it wasnt and shell never take full serve at this petro can location again and I should reimburse her for the extra four cents because the amount of time I took was uncalled for and....
I'm sure you get the idea...
Keep in mind that:
1) I was supposed to reimburse her for gasoline I didnt put in her car
2)My co worker saw her pulling in...
3) I could have filled her tank in the time it took her to rant on and on like that...
Fini
Monday, May 30, 2005
Gross Stupidity, and Just Plain Gross
Another weekend work binge (joy!) and another swath of stories... but Ive been awake for the better part of 30 hours, so I may be a little more brief than I would like to be...
After dealing with drunk people for a few hours, I had, more or less, been pushed to the brink of what I could handle in regards to stupidity... Drunk people are stupid, go figure, eh?
Well... thats not the problem... the problem stems from otherwise sober people (or mostly sober... I'm not here to jusdge)...
You see there are many things I would suggest doing when you start pumping gas... Scan the site looking for drunk hotties; there are usually quite a few of them on friday and saturday nights... Or you could watch the screen by the fuel pumped screen which displays advertisements of products to buy inside the store... Or you could phase out while contemplating the meaning of life and the interrelation of mind body and spirit...
One thing I would NOT recommend doing when you start pumping your gas is... wait for it, wait for it.... light a cigarette...
Needless to say I had a few choice words come out over the intercom... I wont repeat the expletives here, for I'm sure you can all imagine the words I had to say... But rest assured I ended, in a very angry tone, with the word PLEASE!
Something along the lines of "your going to kill us all, put out the cigarette, please"
(For those of you that are wondering, the places I may have sworn are indicated with the spaces)
Now... This is all fine and dandy (the guy actually gave me the finger before he put out his cigarette) but, I kid you not, less than an hour later, a person tries to pull the same shit...
I could have died...
It would have been the biggest explosion in canadian history since the 1917 halifax thingy where a bunch of people were hurt and/or killed...
I could have died twice!
Which leads me to the next topic of choice... People who buy things they shouldn't...
Well, it's not that they shouldn't, because who am I to judge a person... But none the less, I could have a lived a much more happy and meaningful life having avoided these experiences...
These stories have the potential to be a little bit riske, so if your sensitive, replace any objectionable words with puppy...
Here goes...
A man, with a long flowing unwashed white beard and all but 30 hairs gone from the top of his wrinkled comes to the counter and says in a raspy I've-been-smoking-for50-years-voice (overt your eyes):
"I need condoms, lots of condoms"
This guy would have been sensored from Kink...
*shiver*
He also bought pepperoni and smokes...
Later in the evening (thankfully God allowed me a little recovery time, unlike with the smoking) a man, with the whole Im-a-perv look comes in and buys some condoms...
Overall creepy people buy condoms quite a bit, perhaps there is a subculture I am unaware of, where women like the skinny pale skinned 40 y/o mamas boy look, but again, who am I to jusdge...
I digress...
This same man is back about 10 minutes later and asks if he can use the washroom...
On his way out, he politely comments on the fact that there is no more tp left in the washroom...
Since I was still couting on another major bar rush, I figured I would stock up on tp rather than having thirty bimbos complaining about how they had to use paper towel to wipe...
I lock down my fort, double check that there isnt someone walking to the door at that very moment and then make a break to the stock room and then to the washroom...
Thats when I find the surprise (brace yourselves people)
A spent condom is stuck to the inside rim of the toilet (and the last person to use the washroom before him was me... and trust me, I didnt put it there)...
I dont think you can understand how much, at that very moment, I was thinking "I am not getting paid enough"...
I tried flushing the toilet a couldnt of times, completely disregarding the fact that it says on condom wrappers that latex condoms are not to be flushed... I certainly wasnt about to pick it up and put it in the garbage...
I eventually resorted to coaxing it into the bowl with the toilet plunger, burying it with tp so as to provide ample weight the gurantee the disgusting lump of plastic and man-seed was whisked from my life...
Now if only I could find a large roll of metaphysical toilet paper and a large metaphysical toilet so I could get this memory out of my head...
After dealing with drunk people for a few hours, I had, more or less, been pushed to the brink of what I could handle in regards to stupidity... Drunk people are stupid, go figure, eh?
Well... thats not the problem... the problem stems from otherwise sober people (or mostly sober... I'm not here to jusdge)...
You see there are many things I would suggest doing when you start pumping gas... Scan the site looking for drunk hotties; there are usually quite a few of them on friday and saturday nights... Or you could watch the screen by the fuel pumped screen which displays advertisements of products to buy inside the store... Or you could phase out while contemplating the meaning of life and the interrelation of mind body and spirit...
One thing I would NOT recommend doing when you start pumping your gas is... wait for it, wait for it.... light a cigarette...
Needless to say I had a few choice words come out over the intercom... I wont repeat the expletives here, for I'm sure you can all imagine the words I had to say... But rest assured I ended, in a very angry tone, with the word PLEASE!
Something along the lines of "your going to kill us all, put out the cigarette, please"
(For those of you that are wondering, the places I may have sworn are indicated with the spaces)
Now... This is all fine and dandy (the guy actually gave me the finger before he put out his cigarette) but, I kid you not, less than an hour later, a person tries to pull the same shit...
I could have died...
It would have been the biggest explosion in canadian history since the 1917 halifax thingy where a bunch of people were hurt and/or killed...
I could have died twice!
Which leads me to the next topic of choice... People who buy things they shouldn't...
Well, it's not that they shouldn't, because who am I to judge a person... But none the less, I could have a lived a much more happy and meaningful life having avoided these experiences...
These stories have the potential to be a little bit riske, so if your sensitive, replace any objectionable words with puppy...
Here goes...
A man, with a long flowing unwashed white beard and all but 30 hairs gone from the top of his wrinkled comes to the counter and says in a raspy I've-been-smoking-for50-years-voice (overt your eyes):
"I need condoms, lots of condoms"
This guy would have been sensored from Kink...
*shiver*
He also bought pepperoni and smokes...
Later in the evening (thankfully God allowed me a little recovery time, unlike with the smoking) a man, with the whole Im-a-perv look comes in and buys some condoms...
Overall creepy people buy condoms quite a bit, perhaps there is a subculture I am unaware of, where women like the skinny pale skinned 40 y/o mamas boy look, but again, who am I to jusdge...
I digress...
This same man is back about 10 minutes later and asks if he can use the washroom...
On his way out, he politely comments on the fact that there is no more tp left in the washroom...
Since I was still couting on another major bar rush, I figured I would stock up on tp rather than having thirty bimbos complaining about how they had to use paper towel to wipe...
I lock down my fort, double check that there isnt someone walking to the door at that very moment and then make a break to the stock room and then to the washroom...
Thats when I find the surprise (brace yourselves people)
A spent condom is stuck to the inside rim of the toilet (and the last person to use the washroom before him was me... and trust me, I didnt put it there)...
I dont think you can understand how much, at that very moment, I was thinking "I am not getting paid enough"...
I tried flushing the toilet a couldnt of times, completely disregarding the fact that it says on condom wrappers that latex condoms are not to be flushed... I certainly wasnt about to pick it up and put it in the garbage...
I eventually resorted to coaxing it into the bowl with the toilet plunger, burying it with tp so as to provide ample weight the gurantee the disgusting lump of plastic and man-seed was whisked from my life...
Now if only I could find a large roll of metaphysical toilet paper and a large metaphysical toilet so I could get this memory out of my head...
Saturday, May 28, 2005
Punk Assed Teenagers
What is the deal with punk ass teenagers... I dont mean to go on a rant here... so I wont, but what gives them the right to make my life so difficult...
And as a side note: if you are ever caught shoplifting, and the person running the store says "fess up now and I'll let you off with a warning", he's not kidding, and he will call the cops, so fess up already...
Some people have to learn the hard way it seems (how did she think she was going to get out of the store with two bags of doritos stuffed in her purse?)
Well, we all think philosophy is just fun and games. Semiotics, deconstruction, Lacanian post-Freudian psychoanalysis, it all seems like good, clean fun. But when the heart gets involved, all our painfully acquired metaphysical insights go right out the window, and we're reduced to battling it out like rutting chimpanzees. It's not pretty. If you're in a relationship, and differences over the fundamental principles of your respective subjectivities are making things difficult, maybe it's time to move on. Find someone new, someone who will accept you and the way your laughably limited human intelligence chooses to codify and rationalize the chaos of existence. After all, in the absence of a clear, unquestionable revelation from God, that's all we're all doing anyway. So remember: take care of yourselves - and each other.
Announcer: Be sure to tune in next time, when KKK strippers battle it out with transvestite omnisexual porn stars! Tomorrow on Springer!
And as a side note: if you are ever caught shoplifting, and the person running the store says "fess up now and I'll let you off with a warning", he's not kidding, and he will call the cops, so fess up already...
Some people have to learn the hard way it seems (how did she think she was going to get out of the store with two bags of doritos stuffed in her purse?)
Well, we all think philosophy is just fun and games. Semiotics, deconstruction, Lacanian post-Freudian psychoanalysis, it all seems like good, clean fun. But when the heart gets involved, all our painfully acquired metaphysical insights go right out the window, and we're reduced to battling it out like rutting chimpanzees. It's not pretty. If you're in a relationship, and differences over the fundamental principles of your respective subjectivities are making things difficult, maybe it's time to move on. Find someone new, someone who will accept you and the way your laughably limited human intelligence chooses to codify and rationalize the chaos of existence. After all, in the absence of a clear, unquestionable revelation from God, that's all we're all doing anyway. So remember: take care of yourselves - and each other.
Announcer: Be sure to tune in next time, when KKK strippers battle it out with transvestite omnisexual porn stars! Tomorrow on Springer!
Friday, May 27, 2005
ESL
As I'm sure you know (as most of you should be frequents by now) we have prepay at night at our gas station. You pay, then pump.
This evening, I announced over the intercom that prepaying inside was necessary...
But there was a big van blocking the large window by the till, so I could not see who was comming from where...
An elderly Japanese lady came into the store, and politely says "$20"... with dollar pronounced "dough-lah" in cute little old asian lady voice.
I ask "pump 5? or pump 7?"
she nods and says "yes, yes"
I turn directly to pointing
"pump 5?" in the direction of pump five
"or pump 7?" in the direction of pump 7...
She nods and puts a $20 bill on the table...
I go for it, and put $20 onto pump 7 and tell her to pump away...
She smiles and leaves... nothing is amiss as I clear pump 7 to start pumping (please keep in mind that the van is still in the way)
the gas finishes pumping, and an elderly man walks in to inform me that he wanted to put more gas in, and that pump 7 had stopped at $20 and he was unable to get it to start again... and that the elderly lady at pump 5 was obviously having trouble getting her pump started as well...
Ahahahaha... so now I'm left with $20 of gas that is paid for and pumped by seperate people, and a person who wants more than $20 of gas, but has to pay for a transaction that, for all intents and purposes, has already been completed...
All while I have 20 people in the store, lines up with slurpees and doritos (on special for $1.78 including tax)
Joy!!!
My second story is a bit shorter...
An asian man comes in, asks to prepay for $30 gas, and pays on his credit card...
This is al fine and dandy until he goes back out to his car...
You see, rather than pumping his gas, like he should have, he realized his gas tank was on the opposing side, so he moved around to another pump...
this is very bad because:
1) pre-paying is pump specific and we are not able to switch funds from one pump to the other easily
2) transferring funds from one pump to another involves cancelling one transaction and initiating another transaction
3) Cancelling a credit card transaction requires a customer signature and deposits funds directly back onto the credit card
4) Initiating a new transaction requires the new transaction to be paid for, most likely by the same credit card used to cancel the former transaction...
Do we see the bind I was in...
And there were huge numbers of people in the store...
Oh well... who can you do... I mean what...
This evening, I announced over the intercom that prepaying inside was necessary...
But there was a big van blocking the large window by the till, so I could not see who was comming from where...
An elderly Japanese lady came into the store, and politely says "$20"... with dollar pronounced "dough-lah" in cute little old asian lady voice.
I ask "pump 5? or pump 7?"
she nods and says "yes, yes"
I turn directly to pointing
"pump 5?" in the direction of pump five
"or pump 7?" in the direction of pump 7...
She nods and puts a $20 bill on the table...
I go for it, and put $20 onto pump 7 and tell her to pump away...
She smiles and leaves... nothing is amiss as I clear pump 7 to start pumping (please keep in mind that the van is still in the way)
the gas finishes pumping, and an elderly man walks in to inform me that he wanted to put more gas in, and that pump 7 had stopped at $20 and he was unable to get it to start again... and that the elderly lady at pump 5 was obviously having trouble getting her pump started as well...
Ahahahaha... so now I'm left with $20 of gas that is paid for and pumped by seperate people, and a person who wants more than $20 of gas, but has to pay for a transaction that, for all intents and purposes, has already been completed...
All while I have 20 people in the store, lines up with slurpees and doritos (on special for $1.78 including tax)
Joy!!!
My second story is a bit shorter...
An asian man comes in, asks to prepay for $30 gas, and pays on his credit card...
This is al fine and dandy until he goes back out to his car...
You see, rather than pumping his gas, like he should have, he realized his gas tank was on the opposing side, so he moved around to another pump...
this is very bad because:
1) pre-paying is pump specific and we are not able to switch funds from one pump to the other easily
2) transferring funds from one pump to another involves cancelling one transaction and initiating another transaction
3) Cancelling a credit card transaction requires a customer signature and deposits funds directly back onto the credit card
4) Initiating a new transaction requires the new transaction to be paid for, most likely by the same credit card used to cancel the former transaction...
Do we see the bind I was in...
And there were huge numbers of people in the store...
Oh well... who can you do... I mean what...
Wednesday, May 25, 2005
Hands Down, Worst Work Day Ever
So, the title is subjective... Im sure others have had worse experiences... But this takes the cake for me...
Normally I dont work mornings... Ever... And anyone who knows my sleeping habits knows why mornings dont work for me... Actually, their lucky I show up for afternoon shifts either...
But needless to say, when I arrived at work today, I wasnt bright eyed and bushy tailed...
oh no... not even close...
In fact, I probibly resembled something more akin to a rabid badger than a squirrel...
I love mornings oh so much...
I drank some coffee before I ran into my boss, in the hopes that i could convince her that at that moment in time I hated her with a most unquenchable firey hate... well... at least be convincing enough that I could get more hours... Cuz really, I'll do it all over again for the paycheck...
Back to the story... I forced myself to be perky, so as not to piss off any of the customers (morning customers are much nicer than afternoon/evening customers... so I try to be nicer to them as well), and I stuggled to keep on to the false sense of "I <3 JOB" for as long as I could...
I was victorious... my bos left to her meeting having never known my true feelings...
I was home free... or so I thought...
I was just settling into the routine of dusting and serving when my co-worker informed me that she had been asked to do drive arounds (check out competitors prices and communicate back to head office with them) and to do the banking (we buy tons of rolls of change each week in order to have suficient pennies)...
I was then left by myself for the next hour...
Now your probibly thinking... "Oh poor boy had to manage the till all by himself for an hour"... We are a very busy store in a very dense neighbourhood.. and we despense slurpees (the goo of satan)... It was a very rough hour indeed...
She brought me back luch (bless her heart) and gave me twenty minutes to scarf it down before we put the full serve open sign back out...
But of course, rush of customers, and an hour later im eating cold chalupas and watery pop =/
My boss had told me to buy extra pizza subs when the sub guy comes... I haven't worked the shift in about 9 months, so I havent seen the sub guy in as long... And that would be assuming it was the same sub guy (which it, of course, wasnt)... So the McSweeny guy comes into the store with paper and pens and says "I'm here for the delivery"...
I go into drug deal mode "you got the subs"
"none said anything about subs"
"The boss wants extra pizza subs, you got what I need?"
"yeah, i got pizza subs, you sure your looking?"
"if you got what i need, I'm buying"
Needless to say, the conversation didnt progress quite like that, but I ended up buying and extra 20 pizza subs (my boss didnt say how many more she wanted... in fact, she didnt specify how many she would normally get)...
I do my payout for the McSweeny Subs, he drops them o ff in the display case, and I continue about my businaess... Not five minutes after Mr McSweeny leaves, a guy shows up carring an armful of subs and sandwhiches... And makes mention that he brought extra pizza subs but wasnt sure how many extra to bring because my boss didnt specify how many she wanted...
Crap
So now I have 20 pieces of evidence to hide, because I bought 20 pizza subs outside of contract... not to mention that the extra subs I bought aren't the subs that are included in the sub combo, which is the reason we ended up needing more subs in the first place
crap crap crap
Did I mention that we are in a very dense neighbourhood... and also that there are three elementary schools and two high schools within walking distance of my store...
and that we are one of two stores in the area... and we are the closest...
Needless to say, when the schools ended for the day, it was standing room only and I am yelling at kids to "take off [their] godamned roller blades or their going to slip on slurpee goo and break [their] goddamned heads"...
I didnt say goddamned, but I can assure you it was implied with the sound of my voice...
The comes time for second slurpee... I kid you not, the children in my town are like hobbitzes... They need to have first slurpee luch and second slurpee lunch and third slurpee dinner...
And this time they bring their little sibling and parents with stollers, which, despite the lack of baby, must be pushed around the store and through the throngs of customers, almost expecting the aisles to part like the red sea (or reed sea if you listen to Dr Muir and Dr Nelson)...
Thats when the phone calls start...
The first one is nice enough "I had asked your boss to have my car towed because it had stalled, but she had faxed the owner information to the wrong place, and I'm not able to do something because the place where my car is doesnt have that information... can you get your boss to fax it to the right place"
I informed him that my boss was at a meeting and wouldnt be in again today, and he asked if I could do it... I said I would call my boss, see what was up and cal him back... he said "ok but just in case, im going to come out to get a copy for myself"...
I phone my boss, but she was with corporate type people. and told me she would phone back...
I go back to serving the throngs of people..
Another phone call...
"Did you sort everything out with your boss?"
"nope"
"well just get the papers, I'll take them myself"
"I need to get my boss to tell me what papers and where they are"
"okay I'll call back"
I go back to serving customers... when it dies down a bit I call my boss again... no answer...
another phone call
"I'm outside, you got the papers"
"no I havent gotten the papers, Im still waiting on my manager"
"why do you need a manager, just print it off yourself"
"I dont have access to the printer"
"theres a computer right in front of you"
"I dont even know what I would be printing off, and the computer is in the office"
"What kind of retards are they hiring these days, its not my fault your too stupid to do this just pretend that your not stupid and print it off Im in a hurry and I dont have time to wait for a fucking idiot god..."
click... i hung up and started serving the throngs of customers...
another phone call... I let my coworker answer it...
he goes on a rant, she informs him that we're really busy and that if he wants he can come wait in the store, and we'll help him in person as soon as we can...
He says something alaong the lines of her being a lying bitch (it starts with c and rhymes with unt) and that he can see the store and its not busy at all... She informs him it is, and he goes on a long rant in which she holds the phone away from her ear... god only knows what he said...
She hangs up...
It rings again and she answers "cloverdale petro can"
he hangs up...
About ten minutes later, we get a phone call... from his wife, saying that we should conduct our business better and announce what the company is when we answer the phone and that its our fault that this situation occurred and that she is not impressed and blah blah blah blah blah...
That was my day!
Normally I dont work mornings... Ever... And anyone who knows my sleeping habits knows why mornings dont work for me... Actually, their lucky I show up for afternoon shifts either...
But needless to say, when I arrived at work today, I wasnt bright eyed and bushy tailed...
oh no... not even close...
In fact, I probibly resembled something more akin to a rabid badger than a squirrel...
I love mornings oh so much...
I drank some coffee before I ran into my boss, in the hopes that i could convince her that at that moment in time I hated her with a most unquenchable firey hate... well... at least be convincing enough that I could get more hours... Cuz really, I'll do it all over again for the paycheck...
Back to the story... I forced myself to be perky, so as not to piss off any of the customers (morning customers are much nicer than afternoon/evening customers... so I try to be nicer to them as well), and I stuggled to keep on to the false sense of "I <3 JOB" for as long as I could...
I was victorious... my bos left to her meeting having never known my true feelings...
I was home free... or so I thought...
I was just settling into the routine of dusting and serving when my co-worker informed me that she had been asked to do drive arounds (check out competitors prices and communicate back to head office with them) and to do the banking (we buy tons of rolls of change each week in order to have suficient pennies)...
I was then left by myself for the next hour...
Now your probibly thinking... "Oh poor boy had to manage the till all by himself for an hour"... We are a very busy store in a very dense neighbourhood.. and we despense slurpees (the goo of satan)... It was a very rough hour indeed...
She brought me back luch (bless her heart) and gave me twenty minutes to scarf it down before we put the full serve open sign back out...
But of course, rush of customers, and an hour later im eating cold chalupas and watery pop =/
My boss had told me to buy extra pizza subs when the sub guy comes... I haven't worked the shift in about 9 months, so I havent seen the sub guy in as long... And that would be assuming it was the same sub guy (which it, of course, wasnt)... So the McSweeny guy comes into the store with paper and pens and says "I'm here for the delivery"...
I go into drug deal mode "you got the subs"
"none said anything about subs"
"The boss wants extra pizza subs, you got what I need?"
"yeah, i got pizza subs, you sure your looking?"
"if you got what i need, I'm buying"
Needless to say, the conversation didnt progress quite like that, but I ended up buying and extra 20 pizza subs (my boss didnt say how many more she wanted... in fact, she didnt specify how many she would normally get)...
I do my payout for the McSweeny Subs, he drops them o ff in the display case, and I continue about my businaess... Not five minutes after Mr McSweeny leaves, a guy shows up carring an armful of subs and sandwhiches... And makes mention that he brought extra pizza subs but wasnt sure how many extra to bring because my boss didnt specify how many she wanted...
Crap
So now I have 20 pieces of evidence to hide, because I bought 20 pizza subs outside of contract... not to mention that the extra subs I bought aren't the subs that are included in the sub combo, which is the reason we ended up needing more subs in the first place
crap crap crap
Did I mention that we are in a very dense neighbourhood... and also that there are three elementary schools and two high schools within walking distance of my store...
and that we are one of two stores in the area... and we are the closest...
Needless to say, when the schools ended for the day, it was standing room only and I am yelling at kids to "take off [their] godamned roller blades or their going to slip on slurpee goo and break [their] goddamned heads"...
I didnt say goddamned, but I can assure you it was implied with the sound of my voice...
The comes time for second slurpee... I kid you not, the children in my town are like hobbitzes... They need to have first slurpee luch and second slurpee lunch and third slurpee dinner...
And this time they bring their little sibling and parents with stollers, which, despite the lack of baby, must be pushed around the store and through the throngs of customers, almost expecting the aisles to part like the red sea (or reed sea if you listen to Dr Muir and Dr Nelson)...
Thats when the phone calls start...
The first one is nice enough "I had asked your boss to have my car towed because it had stalled, but she had faxed the owner information to the wrong place, and I'm not able to do something because the place where my car is doesnt have that information... can you get your boss to fax it to the right place"
I informed him that my boss was at a meeting and wouldnt be in again today, and he asked if I could do it... I said I would call my boss, see what was up and cal him back... he said "ok but just in case, im going to come out to get a copy for myself"...
I phone my boss, but she was with corporate type people. and told me she would phone back...
I go back to serving the throngs of people..
Another phone call...
"Did you sort everything out with your boss?"
"nope"
"well just get the papers, I'll take them myself"
"I need to get my boss to tell me what papers and where they are"
"okay I'll call back"
I go back to serving customers... when it dies down a bit I call my boss again... no answer...
another phone call
"I'm outside, you got the papers"
"no I havent gotten the papers, Im still waiting on my manager"
"why do you need a manager, just print it off yourself"
"I dont have access to the printer"
"theres a computer right in front of you"
"I dont even know what I would be printing off, and the computer is in the office"
"What kind of retards are they hiring these days, its not my fault your too stupid to do this just pretend that your not stupid and print it off Im in a hurry and I dont have time to wait for a fucking idiot god..."
click... i hung up and started serving the throngs of customers...
another phone call... I let my coworker answer it...
he goes on a rant, she informs him that we're really busy and that if he wants he can come wait in the store, and we'll help him in person as soon as we can...
He says something alaong the lines of her being a lying bitch (it starts with c and rhymes with unt) and that he can see the store and its not busy at all... She informs him it is, and he goes on a long rant in which she holds the phone away from her ear... god only knows what he said...
She hangs up...
It rings again and she answers "cloverdale petro can"
he hangs up...
About ten minutes later, we get a phone call... from his wife, saying that we should conduct our business better and announce what the company is when we answer the phone and that its our fault that this situation occurred and that she is not impressed and blah blah blah blah blah...
That was my day!
Sunday, May 22, 2005
Phone Cards
Quick addition today (sorry)
Guy walks into the store, and with the thickest punjab accent I have ever heard says:
"twenty twenty five two" (imagine this with an east indian accent, or with Quick's generic newfie east indian accent)
Needless to say, I looked at this guy with an absolute blank stare... I honestly dont think I've been more confused in my entire life...
Naturally, he figures if he says it louder, it will make more sense...
"Twenty twenty five two!!" (use the exclaimations as indication for how loud it was)
no response from me
"Twenty twenty five two!!!!!"
I cocked my head sideways slightly
"TWENTY TWENTY FIVE TWO!!!!!!!"
I figured that by now he would understand that I wasn't going to understad him... but he didn't... So I asked him to point... He points to the phone card machine and says "phone card!!!"
I clue in, slightly...
"So you would like a $5 phone card from 20/20" (and long distance phone card distributing company)
"TWO!!! TWO!!!"
so yes... he wanted two $5 20/20 cards... which I gave to him...
and then i went outside to have my first (erm... second) cigarette in the last two weeks...
Guy walks into the store, and with the thickest punjab accent I have ever heard says:
"twenty twenty five two" (imagine this with an east indian accent, or with Quick's generic newfie east indian accent)
Needless to say, I looked at this guy with an absolute blank stare... I honestly dont think I've been more confused in my entire life...
Naturally, he figures if he says it louder, it will make more sense...
"Twenty twenty five two!!" (use the exclaimations as indication for how loud it was)
no response from me
"Twenty twenty five two!!!!!"
I cocked my head sideways slightly
"TWENTY TWENTY FIVE TWO!!!!!!!"
I figured that by now he would understand that I wasn't going to understad him... but he didn't... So I asked him to point... He points to the phone card machine and says "phone card!!!"
I clue in, slightly...
"So you would like a $5 phone card from 20/20" (and long distance phone card distributing company)
"TWO!!! TWO!!!"
so yes... he wanted two $5 20/20 cards... which I gave to him...
and then i went outside to have my first (erm... second) cigarette in the last two weeks...
Thursday, May 19, 2005
Indoctrination
Well, i'm back in Surrey... even better, Im back working at Petro Can... I know some of you are salavating right now, waiting for me to start into my vast array of petro can stories, but sadly, nothing has happened as of yet... Yesterday was a really slow day... And I'm pretty sure, even if we did have any really stupid customers, I probibly wouldnt have remembered them (Starting work at 6am is not something that goes over very well with my body apparently)
I will, of course, try to humour you with a few anecdotes...
For those of you that don't know, BC just had an election... And although I would consider myself a left of centre person, i did end up voting for the bc liberal party (don't let the name fool you, the Liberal party of bc is further right than the NDP party... and actually acts a lot more like the conservative party of cananda rather than the liberal party of canada... especially in regards to speding and taxes...)
I digress...
It seems that a lot of people have forgotten the damage the NDP did the decade they were in power. They turned our economy from the historical stongest (I kid you not, BC had the strongest economy of Canada for most of the time since BC joined confederation) to one that was only moderately better than Newfoundlands. They drove countless headquaters to Calgary, and they caused BC to be in a majour recession whilst the Rest of Canada was seeing growth that hadn't been seen since the post war period of the 50's and 60's...
The liberal came into power 4 years ago, and turned a record breaking deficit into a near record breaking surplus. More jobs, more money, more developement blah blah blah... But due to the economc constraints of trying to get rid of a deficit, heathcare and education spending hasn't increased as much as many would believe it should... So the NDP ended up winning a lot more seats than they did during the last election...
but (thank god) the liberals still have the majourity, and, as this is majour news adn we tend to sell out of papers on majour news days, I was left explaining the election results to a lot of people...
Ah ha ha ha!!!
I love giving the results to people who find out the person they voted for didnt get into power... better yet, I love bragging that the person I voted for did get into power when they go on a rant about how sucky the opposition is...
Anyways...
I had an old lady tell me it was a shame I dye my hair... She gave me a disappointed look and then left the store...
I think thats all I have to add today...
I start graveyard tonight... so maybe we'll have some stories for y'all tomorrow...
Adios
I will, of course, try to humour you with a few anecdotes...
For those of you that don't know, BC just had an election... And although I would consider myself a left of centre person, i did end up voting for the bc liberal party (don't let the name fool you, the Liberal party of bc is further right than the NDP party... and actually acts a lot more like the conservative party of cananda rather than the liberal party of canada... especially in regards to speding and taxes...)
I digress...
It seems that a lot of people have forgotten the damage the NDP did the decade they were in power. They turned our economy from the historical stongest (I kid you not, BC had the strongest economy of Canada for most of the time since BC joined confederation) to one that was only moderately better than Newfoundlands. They drove countless headquaters to Calgary, and they caused BC to be in a majour recession whilst the Rest of Canada was seeing growth that hadn't been seen since the post war period of the 50's and 60's...
The liberal came into power 4 years ago, and turned a record breaking deficit into a near record breaking surplus. More jobs, more money, more developement blah blah blah... But due to the economc constraints of trying to get rid of a deficit, heathcare and education spending hasn't increased as much as many would believe it should... So the NDP ended up winning a lot more seats than they did during the last election...
but (thank god) the liberals still have the majourity, and, as this is majour news adn we tend to sell out of papers on majour news days, I was left explaining the election results to a lot of people...
Ah ha ha ha!!!
I love giving the results to people who find out the person they voted for didnt get into power... better yet, I love bragging that the person I voted for did get into power when they go on a rant about how sucky the opposition is...
Anyways...
I had an old lady tell me it was a shame I dye my hair... She gave me a disappointed look and then left the store...
I think thats all I have to add today...
I start graveyard tonight... so maybe we'll have some stories for y'all tomorrow...
Adios
Thursday, April 28, 2005
Milk Continued
Well... I figured I would make one last post prior to my departure for choir tour... And I have just now come into posession of some pics of the milk off (none of the guys morning show, it would seem) but pics none the less!
http://img97.echo.cx/img97/8817/007400156gb.jpg
http://img247.echo.cx/img247/6865/007400165up.jpg
http://img218.echo.cx/img218/4862/007400185ll.jpg
http://img257.echo.cx/img257/5141/007400190hb.jpg
http://img259.echo.cx/img259/1405/007400205ui.jpg
http://img190.echo.cx/img190/6355/007400228op.jpg
http://img253.echo.cx/img253/2938/007400231bf.jpg
http://img242.echo.cx/img242/6852/007400249lo.jpg
(apologies for the pics not showing... I am not computer literate and its late... so let the copy paste fest begin)
http://img97.echo.cx/img97/8817/007400156gb.jpg
http://img247.echo.cx/img247/6865/007400165up.jpg
http://img218.echo.cx/img218/4862/007400185ll.jpg
http://img257.echo.cx/img257/5141/007400190hb.jpg
http://img259.echo.cx/img259/1405/007400205ui.jpg
http://img190.echo.cx/img190/6355/007400228op.jpg
http://img253.echo.cx/img253/2938/007400231bf.jpg
http://img242.echo.cx/img242/6852/007400249lo.jpg
(apologies for the pics not showing... I am not computer literate and its late... so let the copy paste fest begin)
Wednesday, April 20, 2005
Propoganda Time
Well, with an impending federal election (has it been called yet? if not I can't imagine it will be very long) there has been a lot of talk in the forums I frequent about who will be voted for...
One in particular, skyscraperpage (great website btw), I was questioned why I would continue to vote liberal... I answered that, although my beliefs conform more with the green party platform, Harper scares me, and until he is out of the picture, I will vote for the party that i see as having the best chance for standing up against him (and if need be I will change my vote to NDP)...
When asked how Harper scares me, one of my fellow forumers came to my defense with a list of quotes... I think that they are great...
EVERYONE! I urge you... We all know how politics work, and although we vote for a party, we actually end up voting on a person... This is the person who will run our country! Please consider what he is saying, and weigh that against your knowledge of the platform the conservatives present.
I present to you, the list of quotes: (italicized items added by me)
"It's past time the feds scrapped the Canada Health Act."
(Must get rid of the safety blanket that protects all Canadians)
"What we clearly need is experimentation with market reforms and private delivery options [in health care]."
(Because its unfair to the rich that they get the same quality service as the rest of us, eh?)
"Continental economic and security integration" with the U.S. as well as a "continental energy strategy" that should be broadened "to a range of other natural resources."
(Rape, Rape, Rape; Pillage, Pillage, Pillage)
"Canada appears content to become a second-tier socialistic country, boasting ever more loudly about its economy and social services to mask its second-rate status, led by a second-world strongman appropriately suited for the task."
(The eighth largest economy, and one of the highest standards of living... Second tier socialism is working, wouldn't you say?)
"make no mistake. Canada is not a bilingual country. In fact it is less bilingual today than it has ever been...As a religion, bilingualism is the god that failed. It has led to no fairness, produced no unity, and cost Canadian taxpayers untold millions.”
(Don't have to worry about him getting the Quebec vote... phew)
“It is imperative to take the initiative, to build firewalls around Alberta"
(Sharing means caring... Alberta doesn't care?)
"Albertans in particular, need to think hard about their
future in this country. After sober reflection, Albertans should decide that it is time to seek a new relationship with Canada. …Having hit a wall, the next logical step is not to bang our heads against it. It is to take the bricks and begin building another home. It is time to look at Quebec and to learn."
(LMAO! Alberta certainly wasn't complaining when they were the ones getting the handouts when their economy went bust... guess what, one province is always going to be in first place, and they're not always going to be able to seperate)
“Whether Canada ends up as one national government or two national governments or several national governments, or some other kind of arrangement is, quite frankly, secondary in my opinion…"
("I don't care if this country falls apart..." WOW!!!)
"There is a dependence in the region (Atlantic Canada) that breeds a culture of defeatism,"
(No... it's decades of being told that their too stupid to care for themselves by HtT pronvinces that leads to Altlantic defeatism)
"You've got to remember that west of Winnipeg the ridings the Liberals hold are dominated by people who are recent Asian immigrants: people who live in ghettoes and who are not integrated into western Canadian society."
(!!!!!!I cannot believe he is allowed to make comments like this!!!!!!!!)
“I don't know all the facts on Iraq, but I think we should work closely with the Americans.”
(In his defense this is, apparently, before no WMD's were found...)
“We should have been there shoulder to shoulder with our allies. Our concern is the instability of our government as an ally."
(Invade first... if BushCo does it, it must be right)
"there is now no more important foreign policy interest for Canada
than maintaining the ability to exercise effective influence in Washington so as to advance unique Canadian policy objectives.”
(Canada was founded upon manipulation of it's allies... seems reasonable to continue
/sarcasm off)
"we support the war effort and believe we should be supporting our troops and our allies and be there with them doing everything necessary to win"
(War mongering, anyone... I for one support nothing more than the peace keeping Canada is known and loved for)
“We must aim to make [Canada] a lower tax jurisdiction than the United States.”
(Lower taxes does not make sense... Well, at least to me... Where do we suppose our taxes got to? To pay for roads, schools, health care, welfare... Would we rather user fees? Would you rather only have to pay every time you drove on a road, or should we have a fee for elementary school kids... kick 'em out if their parents don't fork out the cash... I refuse to aknowledge any person who complains about taxes, but has ever taken advantage of the things that taxes afford us... Human life over profit... I'm done now)
I really Hope you will all take this into consideration... To say that its important, to me, is an understatement... Farewell
One in particular, skyscraperpage (great website btw), I was questioned why I would continue to vote liberal... I answered that, although my beliefs conform more with the green party platform, Harper scares me, and until he is out of the picture, I will vote for the party that i see as having the best chance for standing up against him (and if need be I will change my vote to NDP)...
When asked how Harper scares me, one of my fellow forumers came to my defense with a list of quotes... I think that they are great...
EVERYONE! I urge you... We all know how politics work, and although we vote for a party, we actually end up voting on a person... This is the person who will run our country! Please consider what he is saying, and weigh that against your knowledge of the platform the conservatives present.
I present to you, the list of quotes: (italicized items added by me)
"It's past time the feds scrapped the Canada Health Act."
(Must get rid of the safety blanket that protects all Canadians)
"What we clearly need is experimentation with market reforms and private delivery options [in health care]."
(Because its unfair to the rich that they get the same quality service as the rest of us, eh?)
"Continental economic and security integration" with the U.S. as well as a "continental energy strategy" that should be broadened "to a range of other natural resources."
(Rape, Rape, Rape; Pillage, Pillage, Pillage)
"Canada appears content to become a second-tier socialistic country, boasting ever more loudly about its economy and social services to mask its second-rate status, led by a second-world strongman appropriately suited for the task."
(The eighth largest economy, and one of the highest standards of living... Second tier socialism is working, wouldn't you say?)
"make no mistake. Canada is not a bilingual country. In fact it is less bilingual today than it has ever been...As a religion, bilingualism is the god that failed. It has led to no fairness, produced no unity, and cost Canadian taxpayers untold millions.”
(Don't have to worry about him getting the Quebec vote... phew)
“It is imperative to take the initiative, to build firewalls around Alberta"
(Sharing means caring... Alberta doesn't care?)
"Albertans in particular, need to think hard about their
future in this country. After sober reflection, Albertans should decide that it is time to seek a new relationship with Canada. …Having hit a wall, the next logical step is not to bang our heads against it. It is to take the bricks and begin building another home. It is time to look at Quebec and to learn."
(LMAO! Alberta certainly wasn't complaining when they were the ones getting the handouts when their economy went bust... guess what, one province is always going to be in first place, and they're not always going to be able to seperate)
“Whether Canada ends up as one national government or two national governments or several national governments, or some other kind of arrangement is, quite frankly, secondary in my opinion…"
("I don't care if this country falls apart..." WOW!!!)
"There is a dependence in the region (Atlantic Canada) that breeds a culture of defeatism,"
(No... it's decades of being told that their too stupid to care for themselves by HtT pronvinces that leads to Altlantic defeatism)
"You've got to remember that west of Winnipeg the ridings the Liberals hold are dominated by people who are recent Asian immigrants: people who live in ghettoes and who are not integrated into western Canadian society."
(!!!!!!I cannot believe he is allowed to make comments like this!!!!!!!!)
“I don't know all the facts on Iraq, but I think we should work closely with the Americans.”
(In his defense this is, apparently, before no WMD's were found...)
“We should have been there shoulder to shoulder with our allies. Our concern is the instability of our government as an ally."
(Invade first... if BushCo does it, it must be right)
"there is now no more important foreign policy interest for Canada
than maintaining the ability to exercise effective influence in Washington so as to advance unique Canadian policy objectives.”
(Canada was founded upon manipulation of it's allies... seems reasonable to continue
/sarcasm off)
"we support the war effort and believe we should be supporting our troops and our allies and be there with them doing everything necessary to win"
(War mongering, anyone... I for one support nothing more than the peace keeping Canada is known and loved for)
“We must aim to make [Canada] a lower tax jurisdiction than the United States.”
(Lower taxes does not make sense... Well, at least to me... Where do we suppose our taxes got to? To pay for roads, schools, health care, welfare... Would we rather user fees? Would you rather only have to pay every time you drove on a road, or should we have a fee for elementary school kids... kick 'em out if their parents don't fork out the cash... I refuse to aknowledge any person who complains about taxes, but has ever taken advantage of the things that taxes afford us... Human life over profit... I'm done now)
I really Hope you will all take this into consideration... To say that its important, to me, is an understatement... Farewell
Terrible
okay, this is a warning (a serious one)... If you don't have a sense of humour, stop reading now... This joke was inches away from offending me, so I have little idea what effect it will have on the general population...
I am not kidding when I say stop reading... I don't want hate mail for this...
Okay, now that I've got your attention, this is the most I've laughed since the retarded kitten... I'll put the answer in a reply for our sensitive readers...
How do you kill a one legged fox?
I am not kidding when I say stop reading... I don't want hate mail for this...
Okay, now that I've got your attention, this is the most I've laughed since the retarded kitten... I'll put the answer in a reply for our sensitive readers...
How do you kill a one legged fox?
Tuesday, April 19, 2005
Chemistry
I beginning to think that maybe I should be putting an effort into stuff...
but then again, I keep getting clues that I am at least meeting the status quo for a majourity of my life..
Examples, my entire chemistry class had to learn about Mannich Reactions, Reformatsky Reactions, and Pinacol Synthesis in the last short little while, as it says explicitly that these topics will be on our exam today...
I was not impressed...
I like gringnard reagents and dies-alder synthesis... easy things to remember, and to do...
but all this other stuff is crap... I dont even remember it being in the lecture, and I can't find it in the textbook (I resorted to searching www.organic-chemistry.org in order to find out what these words even mean)... not that thats a bad thing... I mean, anything is more comprehensive than our textbook... I think I learned more chemistry in my biology class (I jest... really I do)
Alas, I really just need to suck it up... 4 more hours (2 if the exam goes really bad) and I wont have to think a chemical thought for another 4 months...
Summer break is upon us! Woot woot woot!!!
See you all on the other side
but then again, I keep getting clues that I am at least meeting the status quo for a majourity of my life..
Examples, my entire chemistry class had to learn about Mannich Reactions, Reformatsky Reactions, and Pinacol Synthesis in the last short little while, as it says explicitly that these topics will be on our exam today...
I was not impressed...
I like gringnard reagents and dies-alder synthesis... easy things to remember, and to do...
but all this other stuff is crap... I dont even remember it being in the lecture, and I can't find it in the textbook (I resorted to searching www.organic-chemistry.org in order to find out what these words even mean)... not that thats a bad thing... I mean, anything is more comprehensive than our textbook... I think I learned more chemistry in my biology class (I jest... really I do)
Alas, I really just need to suck it up... 4 more hours (2 if the exam goes really bad) and I wont have to think a chemical thought for another 4 months...
Summer break is upon us! Woot woot woot!!!
See you all on the other side
Monday, April 18, 2005
Sunday, April 17, 2005
Year End
Well... as I'm sure you know, its the end of the school year...
I'm about ready to go home, for sure, but it's starting to get all sad.
My friends have started packing their things, and they'll be gone within the next two weeks...
Finals start tomorrow; Joy!!!
Oh, and choir tour is gonna be wicked fun! We have planned out a week of extremes. Hot Springs, Paint Ball, Lazer Tag, Coffee... mwahahahahaha
I got a call from my Petro Can boss a few days ago, wondering when i would be back... I'm not entirely sure yet, but I should be back in good time after our final concert...
I'll put a few more random posts like this before the year is up, and hopefully once I readjust to dial-up I'll start reposting all my cool petro can stories (which is why your all here anyways, right?)
I'm about ready to go home, for sure, but it's starting to get all sad.
My friends have started packing their things, and they'll be gone within the next two weeks...
Finals start tomorrow; Joy!!!
Oh, and choir tour is gonna be wicked fun! We have planned out a week of extremes. Hot Springs, Paint Ball, Lazer Tag, Coffee... mwahahahahaha
I got a call from my Petro Can boss a few days ago, wondering when i would be back... I'm not entirely sure yet, but I should be back in good time after our final concert...
I'll put a few more random posts like this before the year is up, and hopefully once I readjust to dial-up I'll start reposting all my cool petro can stories (which is why your all here anyways, right?)
Saturday, April 16, 2005
Retarded Kitten
I seriously laughed for a good ten minutes the first time i saw this... perhaps it makes me a bad person, but at least nothing cruel is happening to it...
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Wednesday, April 13, 2005
Wednesday, April 06, 2005
Meds
So I went to the doctor to get meds for my sleeping troubles...
After explaining my sleeping habits, and the duration for which the habits have occurred over, the doctor gladly signed me up for a prescription (and scolded me for no comming in sooner)...
I am now the happy recipient of a ten day supply of Sarnoc!
After explaining my sleeping habits, and the duration for which the habits have occurred over, the doctor gladly signed me up for a prescription (and scolded me for no comming in sooner)...
I am now the happy recipient of a ten day supply of Sarnoc!
Isn't it a happy little chemical...
Well, needless to say, it is a sleeping pill, that will "knock me out no matter how much coffee I drink"... (so says the pharmacist)
But, praise modern science and test groups, there is a happy little warning in the bottle... I kid you not...
"May cause drowsiness"
I think thats probibly the best line ever..
Oh well, night night time
Lucky Day
So I may or may not have gone to the bar tonight....
And I may or may not have had too much to drink...
But either way, I have a story to tell, and it happens to be that it makes me, probibly, thr happiest Ive been in months!
So I go to (or dont go to, which ever may have been the case) Esmereldas (or ezzies in lamens terms) in order to celebrate the birthday of a young woman whom I have never personally met... Her name is Kristen, and I bought her a shot of amaretto and kalua as a birthday shot, but I digress...
So the thirty dollars I started the night off with is slowly being withered away with drinks for myself as well as birthday shots, so I decide to take out money...
Now, I would say that i am a relatively good planner and, due to the $1.75 surcharge on withdrawls, decide to take out more money than I anticipate spending so as to allow me to have cash for the remainder for the week...
When it comes time for me to remove my money from the money receptacle, I reach my hand out and pull out a wad of money..
I count it to make sure that the amount I requested is the amount recieved and am quite surprised to find $120...
I double check my recipt, to ensure that i hadnt pressed the wrong button instead...
Sure enough, I had pressed the $80 buton...
So now Im $40 richer than I should be, and I attribute said fact to some drunk who obviously forgot to grab his cash when he left...
I quickly joined said drunk in the land of make-bellieve (caused by my anibriated state... paid for by his foolishness)...
Anyways... I figured this was blog worthy...
Hopefully this is all legible...
And I may or may not have had too much to drink...
But either way, I have a story to tell, and it happens to be that it makes me, probibly, thr happiest Ive been in months!
So I go to (or dont go to, which ever may have been the case) Esmereldas (or ezzies in lamens terms) in order to celebrate the birthday of a young woman whom I have never personally met... Her name is Kristen, and I bought her a shot of amaretto and kalua as a birthday shot, but I digress...
So the thirty dollars I started the night off with is slowly being withered away with drinks for myself as well as birthday shots, so I decide to take out money...
Now, I would say that i am a relatively good planner and, due to the $1.75 surcharge on withdrawls, decide to take out more money than I anticipate spending so as to allow me to have cash for the remainder for the week...
When it comes time for me to remove my money from the money receptacle, I reach my hand out and pull out a wad of money..
I count it to make sure that the amount I requested is the amount recieved and am quite surprised to find $120...
I double check my recipt, to ensure that i hadnt pressed the wrong button instead...
Sure enough, I had pressed the $80 buton...
So now Im $40 richer than I should be, and I attribute said fact to some drunk who obviously forgot to grab his cash when he left...
I quickly joined said drunk in the land of make-bellieve (caused by my anibriated state... paid for by his foolishness)...
Anyways... I figured this was blog worthy...
Hopefully this is all legible...
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