I just lit the house on fire...

story later...

Stolen Sidekick

So, I've been following the story of Evan for a while now...

first the link: StolenSidekick

Summary... his friend left her Sidekick in a taxi, and some kid found it, and refused to return it... Theres a lot more to the story, including a rewrd for it's return, some threats, and a fake address...

Now the funny thing about a sidekick, is it can be set up to automatically download any pictures you take onto the internet...

ladies and gentleman, I present to you the face of a thief:




















and her accomplice (the boyfriend or borther... or something)




















Evan (the freidn of the person whos cell was taken) has dedicated his life to making sure that the cell thieves are humiliated for being selfish... So he created the website at the top of this post... It;s a really funny read. It includes both the myspace accounts of all the people involved (my undersanding is that since this story became so well known, people have been able to recognise them and have revealed a lot more information than Evan feels comfortable posting), a song written to commemorate the event (and a promised music video if enough hits are generated), as well as a list of sites that have currently connected to him...

Now... I suppose you wonder while I'm writing all of this...

You see, I checked ou the forum (they've crashed several forums thus far... it's been quite fun) and there is a photoshop section...

I laughed sooOoOOooo hard...

Happy Birthday

So I missed the actual day, because of silly blogspot problems... But yesterday was my blogs second birthday...

yup...

I'm too tired to write anything of interest... perhaps later...

Calgary?

Hello!

I need any of my calgarian friends to contact me (if you're living in Calgary currently)

that is all

Famers Tan

I am well aware that I am developing a farmers tan...

I suppose it comes with the job...

I <3 my farmers tan... So you can make fun of me as much as you want...

It's Good to Be Happy

What is the making of a good day? I ask of you, how does this sound?

a good meal (today I made myself an amazing tomato soup and cream cheese combo... although morgan was right, the appearance left something to be desired... I suppose she's allowed to be right every once in a while)...

debt removal (with luck and a little be of wise spending I should be very close to being debt free in the next two weeks (yay)... well.. assides from student loans)

a job you love (My job has some really sucky parts... But even video game testing requires you to repeat the same things over and over trying to reach a desired outcome (even if you could move on, you need to try to replicate those bugs, you know)... But I love the people I'm working with, even if most of them are jerkfaces... My bosses hasn't given me the "wtf did you do that for" look in about a week, and I managed to talk myself out of two shifts of the job I hate... Oh, did I mention that we were let out half an hour early today so our boss could buy us beer (on account of efficient work leading to a sodding job being dome in less than half the time they tought)... Oh... and tomorrow we get out early so they can cook us hamburgers... and I hate to look too far in advance, but August is comming up with the all you can drink staff party... I tend to test out the limits of the all you can drink... mwahahaha...)

A tan (I havent felt this healthy in a long time... maybe my body i catching up on all the sunlight I missed out on in the last few years)

praise (my boss has said that he respects how quickly I learn things, and the efoort I put in)

air conditioning (after being out in the sun all day, nothing beats comming home and sitting in a house which is a nicely controlled temperature)

good friends (did I mention I <3 you guys... all of you... no exceptions this time (I won't even be mean to morgan))

yup... I'd say it's been a good day...praise God!!! only thing thats gonna make it better is some sleep... I have to save my energy for all the eating I'm going to do tomorrow...



gnight

Golfing

So as I said, I tried my hand at golfing... It was an experience if I've ever had one...

Went with MattyK and Darren (ex-Boss) which was a treat in and of itself (<3 u mattyk!)...

Now I have never golfed before... Matt and Darren both have minimal experience... So I assure you, it was a sight to behold (for the entertainment of it... not just because we're stunningly good looking... although we are stunningly good looking)

It took me two balls to get off the tee... I kid you not... My first shot went straight into the bushes... Which is quite sad, but few of you know the layout of the course... so just accept this... there are no bushes for you to shoot at... unless you're a terribly bad shot... *raises hand*

So my second ball is somewhat less pathetic... It was a grounder (which is amazing since the first tee is off a cliff/hill)...

Matt and Darren were filled with helpful advice like "ha!" and "*laugh*" and "bwahahahha" even though they didnt do much better... They're balls, really, only went about as far as mine did...

Needless to say, my first hole didn't go so well... Live and learn, I suppose...

But I didn't learn, or so it seems..

My second hole was, by far, the most pathetic of the night...

It was a par 5... I stopped counting at 15 hits... Really, I would have done better to just kick it with my foot...

And the green KILLED me... I would hit the ball and it would go flying across the green... I would lightly tap it, and it would roll to the other side... The wind changed, and I think it rolled halfway back down the fairway...

*sigh*

I did get better though... There were a few times where I was within about 30' of the hole and able to say "this is for par"... well... actually, that was just once... and then Neal's curse of the green kicked in...

On the plus side, I did manage to not get a ball stuck in the water hazzard... I use the word stuck because although i hit one dead centre into the water hazzard, it bounced out and into play...

Oh, and the play of the game was a tie... betwen the bank-shot off mattys foot for 1-over-par... and Darrens swing of death (which somehow managed to detatch the head of the club, sending it flying down the fairway further than the ball it hit... He's lucky no one was killed)...

yes... so that was my golfing adventure...

(and some clarification... I will not delete your blog unless you have not updated it sometime between june 1st and june 30th...)

Two Things

First off: I tested out the golf course today... It was good fun, and I think I can make a story about how we turned a par 5 into a par 15...

Second off: I haven't pruned my "other blogs" section since last year... If your blog is listed and you would like to keep it listed I would like to see a post, of any sort, in the month of june... THat's all... Even if the post is 4 words... 'Please don't delete me' or 'I love you Neal'...

Any blogs that don't have a post by the end of june 30th will be cast from my memory...

Also, if you would like your blog added to my list, leave a comment... I'll review, and add (please no spam though... I don't care if my friends write about boring things... but if some stranger posts 100 comments about cheap vaccuum cleaners, you can be sure it's not gonna make it....)

Choir Boy at <3

*sigh*

I probibly shouldn't have been as entertained by this as I was... so hopefully this workes...

Sleep

This whole sleep thing is getting lame...

oh well..

It's only a few more days till payday... and then I can afford rent... and food... and god only knows what else I can do with money and free time (I'm assuming that i'll develope free time once money provides sufficient reason to stay awake)...

I am determined to attempt golfing... I'll let you know how that goes... it might end up being quite the story...

I really shouldn't be awake right now... goodnight

Fight

Todays work experience was sizing up to be quite boring... and for the most part it was... assides from the fight I got in...

I was cleaning up my machine (cuz you do that when you're done your shift) and I headed over to the wash basin in order to hose it down...

I turned on the hose, and thats when the fight broke out...

The hose started flying madly throughout the area, hosing me down intensely (although it looked like it only hosed down my crotch)

I was absolutely stunned by the first wave of frigidly cold water that I was in no way prepared for the second wave that hit me moments after.,..

It t0ook a good 15 seconds of the hose flying around and sraying everything before I finally pulled myself together and turned the hose off...

Thankfully only like 1/2 the people working managed to see the spectacle...

He Said

So my boss looked at me (well... two of us) and said

"You guys impress me!"

Very sincere, looked us in the eye's, no laugh afterwords (or "just kidding" gestures)...

And then he put us back on weedwhacking...


On the plus side, starting work at 530 in the morning makes the day go by a lot quicker (plus it allows me to finish my other duties faster - due to the lack of golfers in the way - which allows me to start weedwhacking even earlier...)

Now I know weedwhacking is a major part of the job, and I knew that before I started working here... but seriously, I've logged about 10 hours of carrying those things in the last two shifts...

and my arms are tired ='(

On the plus side, it gives me something to complain about... and we all know how much I likfe to complain (and bug morgan about being on the 3100)

Tidbit About Me

Turns out I don't like having little pebbles shot up my nose as unbelievable speeds...

I'd like to thank weedwhackers for providing this revelation...

Adverse Effects of Work

So I have come to the realization that although i appreciate consitet work, there are a few things that are left to be desired...

1) Bed starts calling my name at 9pm... by 10, it's screaming my name... by 11, it's having little tantrums...

2) I cannot sleep in past 5... I've tried... If I set my alarm for 5:15, I'm awake by 4:45... eww... I didn't even know there was such a thing as 4:45 in the morning...

3) I do not appreciate rain as much as some people (yes yes, rain is good... I will give you that... but seriously, you have to admit walking around in the pouring rain (with thunder in the distance) carrying a gas powered lightning rod is not cool)

4) I tire of doing weedwhacking... I mean, it's not a particularly difficult job, but I'm not really entertained by it in the slightest... Although the idea of having to do the 'girly' jobs is far more frightening than being forced to carry a weed whacker around all summer...

5) Shorts and weedwhackers are NOT a cool mix (why I was wearing shorts in the rain, I will never know)

6) Soup is not a valid lunch option, in and of itself... I need something more... One of the guys was eating peach yogurt... and I wanted some... thats how hungry I was...

yup... such is my life...

Bunkers

(bunkers are the sand traps on a golf course... I had someone ask me that, so I thought maybe I should clarify)

So far my job has mainly consisted of bunker detail, which is fine and dandy, and I enjoy it quite a lot... Well... asides from the fact that my back feels like ass afterwards...

Anyways...

Bunkers are fairly easy to do so long as you remember three simple things:

1) Old rich people like to complain, so try not to leave anything they can complain about

2) Old rich people like to complain, so try not to make any distractions to complain about

3) Always enter and exit the bunker from a low point in the border

Now as I said, these things are very easy to follow... mostly... Sometimes it's harder to gauge where places are sufficiently low enough (since I've been told to try not to always enter or exit from the same spot... since the grass gets worn away)

Now, before I get too far into my mistakes: REGAN DROVE OUR CART INTO A TREE!!!

My first story happened way back on day two... I had, more or less, just learned the jist of being a bunker rake driver... and I was getting quite proficient at my swirly-swirls and my double backs... My boss is sort of a geek, so I take it when he was making victory arm jestures and 'woo' sounds, that my skills were becomming quite admirable...

Now, as I said, it was day two, and I hadn't quite yet picked up on the entirity of the capabilities of the little tractor rake... They seem to have a lot of power, and the tires have a lot of tread (indicating a lot of traction)...

So whilst finishing my last swoop of one of the bunkers, I begin eyeing up potential exit sites... trying not to make it the same as my entrance... I notice a spot along the east side that looks quite fitting so I drive right for it...

everythig was fine and dandy... until I realised that I had left the rakes down...

Not a problem, I stopped just in time to avoid doing some serious rakage damage to the well manicured lawn... I lifted up the rake and proceeded on my way... But not quite...

Although the lip was an acceptable height, the hill on the other side required a little more momentum than comming from a dead stop... The tread on the tires, rather than acting as traction to get up the hill, we're acting as graters tearing their way into the grass... not cool...

So I throw the thing in reverse, back into the pit and clamour onto the hill praying to god my boss doesn't come around the corner to see how I'm doing...

I try my best to make my mess as disguised as possible (really it looked like a divet... just in a place a ball wouldn;t naturally come to rest) then fixed up the bunker, and drove off like nothing happened...


My next story was today... I was, again, on bunker detail... And after my experience two days before, I was trying to be quite careful as to where I entered and exited... Not a general rule of thumb is wherever there is quite a bit of sand is most certainly the spot there the tractors come out... This is because residual sand is usually knocked off when you hit the bump of the lip...

Turns out there are lots of other reasons for there to be sand on the outside edge of a bunker...

So whilst driving towards my new bunker, I eyed up the spot I would enter... I was downhill a bit, so I couldn't see how much of a drop, but there was plenty of sand, so I figured I was safe...

There wasn't even time for me to brake when I realised how much of a drop it was going to be... And I had to wait a good 5 minutes before one of the mower people came around to help me get my cart off of it's recarious position (I had bottomed out and neither the front nor the back tires could get enough traction to go anywhere)...

Thankfully, no one important was around so I don't owe any beer... But yes...

Karma

The world is starting to even itself out... well.. as far as my job is concerned...

a fricking rock was in one of the bunkers today... So my tractor raking was all f-ed up... cept the rock wouldnt come out of the sand so I didnt know what the problem was... after three sweeps (and about 6" away from a nervous breakdown) it appeared, and I kicked it... hard...

no more rock (I kicked it in a direction that made it a problem for no one)

so to even everything out (including the act that I had to do another 2 hours of weedwhacking, and 2 hours of pushing a lawnmower up a hill) there was beer!

Apparently someone was supposed to glue something... and didnt... And the rule is, if you screw up you buy a 12pack of beer...

I like beer now, btw... mmmMMmmm beer...

that is all

New Job Begins

So today was my first day at the golf course... EXCITING!

today I got to rake EVERY bunker on the property (well.. except the few holes that are out of commision...) but I was put on manual detail.. meaning I was actually in there with a rake in hand pushing sand around until someone came to drive a tractor over it...

I did get to try out the tractor though... fun!!!

After dodging golf balls for a few hours (something it appears my co-worker isn't very good at... judging by the welt left on his leg at hole 16) it was time to weedwack... Everything...

Now, it's been a while since I've weedwacked... but I forgot how absolutely wretched those things are on your arms...

So, between being hunched over bunkers with a rake, and carrying a gas powered "I hate you arms" machine... I can officially say everything is sore.

But I still enjoy my job... good times!

I hope I get to sit on a tractor all day sometime soon

Bacon

Ladies and Gentlemen (not that I expect many of you to be either) I present to you the newest (and greatest) Turf, Alluvium, and Sanitation Engineer for the exclusive Highlands Golf Course...

Okay... I tried to make that sounds prestigious...

Anyways... I'm the maintenance staff... well.. a member of the maintenance staff...

So expect me to be well tanned and in bed by 10 for most of the summer...

I wish I could say I was proud to have achieved this job, but really, the first question was "when can you start?" so I oppose they don't have the highest expectations for their employees (the person who hired me had also never seen my resume, so he had no idea of my work experience, references, name, etc)

Ah yes... summer employment...

Just think... soon I'll be able to afford all the luxuries of life... food, rent, a table mounted usb air dart system for my computer (in action)

So yes...

adios

Gah

Just when I think american people are FINALLY beginning to see what the rest of the world has seen since November 2000 (bush's approval in the US now sits at about 29%... which is around what I remember the worlds approval rating being quoted at not too long ago) I get proof that the american people are just selfish twits (collectively... I know a lot of really decent american individuals)

If I could present to you, image number one...

please note that the gas price is reciprical... meaning that the higher the number, the lower the price...

so yes... bush's popularity is tied to gasoline prices (although other things are affecting it as well)...

Happy Birthday MattyK

So today was mattyk's birthday... you would have thought it was mine...

Everyone visited me tongiht... well.. not everyone... But everyone that counts...

Oh, and I didnt have to eat peanut butter or noodles tonight... Such a nice change...

Actually, come to think of it, I love peanut butter... I really shouldnt complain about it... It could be worse...

Yes...

I wish i could desribe to you just how boring it can be when my roommates are out of the house...

Needless to say, if you are reading this, and in the edmonton area, give me a call, and come hang out... I have board games, you bring the beer =)

And if you don;t know how to contact me, you're probibly some creeper who has no idea who I am, and you;re just reading my blog in a selfish desire to be closer to me...

No thank you... I have enough nuts already (peanuts! hahahhahhahaha!!!)

yes... I should go do something else...